


i could be the subject of your dreams

by goodnightmoon



Category: Baseball RPF
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Soulmate AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-03
Updated: 2016-01-03
Packaged: 2018-05-11 13:40:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5628589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goodnightmoon/pseuds/goodnightmoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Ben is very surprised to learn that his soulmate is male. </p><p>***<br/>Or, the au where their soulmate's name is tattooed somewhere on their body and it's ambiguous as shit, thanks universe</p>
            </blockquote>





	i could be the subject of your dreams

**Author's Note:**

> short and fluffy (◡‿◡✿)

Ben was 3 when it first appeared. 

He ran up to his mother. "Mommy," he asked, "what's this?" He lifted his arm and his sleeve fell down to reveal the word _Alex_ tattooed in his skin. 

She gasped and smiled, placed her hands over her heart. "Oh, Ben," she said, bending down to his level, "it means you have a soulmate. 

That means there's a person who was made just for you. Not everyone has a person like that. When did you see this?"

He scratched at the name. "I was just playing with the blocks," he mumbled. 

She picked him up and sat him down on the counter. "You're so special, Ben," she said. She kissed his forehead, and brushed the hair back off his face. "When you're a big boy, like your daddy, you're gonna find a girl like mommy. That's who this is." She tapped his arm. "That's your soulmate, like I'm daddy's soulmate. See?" She showed him the _Tom_ on her shoulder; Ben blinked. "Anyway, Benny," she continued, "your person, Alex, must've just been born. That means she's a baby." 

"What's she like, mommy?"

"I don't know, sweetheart. But when she grows up and meets you, I bet she'll be very beautiful, and you'll be very handsome." 

While Ben was on the counter, the Gordons were overjoyed that their newborn son had a _Ben_ inked on his arm.

\---  
When Ben was older, around 12 or so, it was explained to him again: he had a soulmate, her name was Alex, she was 3 years younger than he. No one knew when he'd meet her, but when he did, she'd be the prettiest, smartest girl he'd ever seen, and they'd get married, and have lots of babies. 

At least, that's how his mom put it.

When Alex was older, around 9 or so, he learned quickly not to show any of the other kids his tattoo. That is, if he wanted to be "normal." 

\---  
The year that Ben turned 19, he thought he'd found her. Her name was Alexis, and she _was_ beautiful, long brown hair and amber brown eyes, and she _was_ smart, a straight A student, and continually on the honor roll, year after year. 

But she was 17, and had the name _Billie_ tattooed on her back. 

The year Alex turned 16, he doesn't feel the need to hide his tattoo anymore. 

\---  
The Saturday after Ben turned 35, it was raining. Ben was leaving the corner diner on Main Street and stood on the sidewalk, jacket over his head, doing his best to hail a cab. 

"You mind if I pick someone up on the way?" 

After telling the cab driver his destination, Ben had closed the door, and was warming himself by breathing into his fists. 

"No," he said, "I don't mind."

The driver nodded and pulled away from the diner. 

A few minutes later, Ben saw the blurry figure of a man on the sidewalk waving his arms. The cab seemed to drift over to the curb; the window was rolled down, drops of rain splashing onto the seat. 

"Where're you headed?" asked the driver. 

Ben looked out his own window, tuned the answer out - some address, somewhere. It was on the way home, apparently, because the man got in, bringing a burst of cold and wet with him. 

"Sorry," said the man, slamming the door. He took off his hat and ran his fingers through his hair. 

"No problem," said Ben. He glanced him over a couple times. 

Nothing too interesting. 

He looked back out the window. 

"That's my name."

Ben turned, confused. "I'm sorry?"

The man was looking down at Ben's arm. "Sorry, I couldn't help but notice. My name's Alex."

Ben looked down. His sleeve was rolled up enough to show half the _A_ , the _LEX_. He _ah'd_ in recognition. 

"That's neat," he said. 

"Have you met them yet?"

"Um." Ben traced the letters with his finger, then shook his head. "No. No, not yet."

A few moments of quiet and rain passed, with Alex turned to the window, and Ben turned toward Alex. 

"Do you have one?" Ben asked. "A soulmate?"

Alex smiled, began to roll up his sleeve. _Ben_ was written on his forearm. 

Reading the word was like a punch to the gut. 

"Oh." Ben's voice was shaky. He took a deep breath. "Have you found him?"

"Not yet," Alex replied, rolling his sleeve back down. "Hope it happens soon, though. I'm already 32."

Another blow. 

"When'd you get yours?" asked Alex, gesturing to Ben's arm. 

Ben willed himself to talk normally. "I was 3," he said too quickly. 

Alex nodded. "I've had mine since birth."

Ben squeezed his eyes shut and bit his lip to the point where he could taste metal. 

"Oh, this is my stop," Alex said as the car slowed down. 

Ben glanced up with one eye; he couldn't tell exactly where they were, but there were apartment buildings on either side. Alex handed his pay in cash to the driver. 

"Hope you find your _Alex_ soon, man," he said, opening the door, getting out. 

Ben gave a halfhearted wave in response, and the door slammed shut again. 

"Hey, buddy, you okay?" The driver was looking at him in the mirror. "You look a little pale." 

Ben shivered, his eyes focused on his hands. "I - well." 

He frantically pulled his jacket on, ignoring his sleeves being bunched up, and took his wallet out of his jeans. 

"How much do I owe you?" he asked, leaning forward. 

"What?"

"If I leave you here, how much do I owe you?" 

"Uh, about 35 dollars."

"Here, take it, keep it, it's okay," said Ben, handing the driver a 50 dollar bill and opening his door. 

Ben's shoes squeaked on the concrete as he ran the way that Alex had gone. He ignored the passing cars splashing in puddles; Alex couldn't have gone far; did he already go inside? he'd turned a corner, though, and -

"Alex!" cried Ben. 

Alex was just entering one of the buildings, but spun to face the direction his name had been yelled from. 

"Yeah?"

Ben ran faster, almost slipping, until he was within arm's reach. 

He braced himself against his knees to catch his breath, and Alex let go of the door. 

"Did I forget something?" Alex asked, smiling. 

Ben had half a thought to say _yeah, you forgot me_ , but he'd never forgive himself. 

"No, no," he said, straightening up. He waited another second or two, and swallowed. "No, Alex, I came to tell you - tell you that my name is Ben."

Alex was silent, and the smile had dropped off his face. Ben didn't dare read into it. The sound of the rain against the pavement was deafening. 

"I'm 35 years old," he continued. "And I always thought that Alex was a girl. That's what I was always taught. That's what I've always been... expecting."

He paused. Alex was biting his lip. 

"I don't know how I'm gonna tell my parents." He swept the rain out of his eyes and laughed a little. "They always said she was gonna be beautiful."

"Are you saying I'm not beautiful?"

Alex's voice almost startled Ben. His face was deadpan, but his eyes were dancing. 

"No, I - I think you're great," said Ben. 

Above them, thunder cracked the air. 

"Do you wanna come inside?" Alex asked. "I was actually thinking of baking cookies. And making coffee."

Ben smiled. "Yeah," he said. "Sure, I'd like that."

**Author's Note:**

> ignore the plotholes in the universe pls
> 
> also title from bite by troye sivan :)


End file.
